Impressed

I stand in front of a mirror after a workout and I am impressed by God’s work. The abs, the pecks, the arms, I am a masterpiece. Now I have to take a shower, drive back home and get ready for that party. When I roll in, the girls will be like “Ooooh, we got a stripper,” and I will be like “No, I’m no stripper, babe. But play your cards right, and you just might get a private show.”

No, that is too sleazy. How about I show up in a cardigan and glasses and be the nerdy sensitive type but when I can get a girl upstairs, I will eat her out like a masterful master of head.

Or perhaps I will meet my perfect soul mate.The one girl I am destined to be with. She might have small boobs and be a six instead of a ten, that is okay. The ugly ones are grateful. And all the other girls will say “He’s so handsome but he’s with a plain girl like her. He must be an amazing man, I wish he were with me.” But I will remain faithful.

So I take a shower and all that, get to my friend’s house. The guys are playing a video game, drinking beers. “Hey man, where the girls at?”

Posted by: Paweł Kowaluk